Lucy Porter: No Regrets!

The irrepressible Lucy Porter bounces back into action with a show all about regrets. Frank Sinatra had too few to mention, but Lucy’s got hundreds, and she’s prepared to go into graphic detail about all of them. Disastrous dates, professional calamities, ruined friendships and parenting fails. Lucy describes all the mistakes she’s made, works out why they happened, and ponders how her life would have turned out if she’d acted differently.

Lucy looks at the things we might all collectively regret – not sticking to the work-life balance we strove for during lockdown, not realising that clapping for the NHS wouldn’t be enough to save it, allowing people we thought were quite fun on TV to become politicians.

How does regret tie in with guilt and shame? As a middle-aged, middle-class, left-leaning ex-Catholic, guilt is one of Lucy’s top five hobbies (along with going to the garden centre, doing jigsaws, making bread and watching subtitled foreign dramas on Netflix. She’s also ashamed of all these hobbies.)

It’s not all negative though. If you regret something, you can use it to change your ways: see the thing you regret as your rock bottom, and let it spur you on to become a better person. Lucy looks at how she can use shameful or annoying things from her past to change her future.

Lucy regrets volunteering at the school fete when her kids were younger, because now she’s committed to being the Hook a Duck Lady twice a year for the rest of her life. Maybe she could learn to say No a bit more?